I already told you these stories, but I need to write them down so the universe doesn't forget and I learn my lesson

I don’t know why I think celebrities will fall in love with me. I don’t know what makes me think they want someone “normal” and “real” like me. Especially since normal people don’t even fall in love with me and that’s probably because I’m really less of a “normal” person and more “crazy” person and the pool of crazy people lovers is very very small and, to my dismay, includes very few, if any, celebrities. Nonetheless, I spent this entire morning fantasizing about what it would be like if one of the Freaks and Geeks boys fell in love with me after exchanging a few words (and meeting my enchanting, yet “real” and “normal” eyes) at this reunion panel thing and then they would come to my clown show and we would make hilarity forever, taking California by storm. Watch out, here comes the mildly famous, funny looking guy, and that normal girl who he just ran into at a talk and never left. I guess it’s my own version of “discovered in a soda shop” only I know I’m not movie material.
What I apparently don’t know is that celebrities aren’t huge fans of sick, raspy voiced, pimply faced, girls in layer after layer of dirty sweatshirt who tell them “I was so excited I almost peed in my pants”. John Francis Daley’s response to this was a fumbly “Oh, I hope that had nothing to do with anything we did.”
What, exactly, makes me think celebrities find incontinence sexy? I mean, yeah, it’s “real” I guess, but only for the elderly and debilitating drunk. Neither of which, (I’m guessing) is what celebrities are looking for in their down-to-earth-take-the-world-by-storm-in-hilarity-love of their life.
Do you think Martin Starr wants to hear the words “clown school” over and over again and then likes being reminded how to spell his name because he’s doing it really slowly (I thought this would be a fantastic joke. But even now that I think of someone else doing it to me, it seems like possibly one of the most irritating things anyone could ever do after they ask for your autograph)? Yup. Turns out, he’s not really into it.
Also, his answer to “Does every girl tell you she was in love with you” is…surprisingly, no. And he doesn’t look up to answer you, though, and this is my one success of the day, he did laugh when I followed his response with “That’s awkward”.
But maybe the best part was when I asked him to take a picture with me and instead of getting one of the many people waiting in line to take a nice picture, I just took it of us myself. And then they said, “are you sure, your hands are all shaky.” To which, in my most composed self of course, I responded “Well I’m really NERVOUS” and looked at the ground and tried to shuffle away.
To redeem my pride, I guess, Martin got my attention before I could leave and did what he did with everyone, introduce himself. “It was nice to meet you. I’m Martin.” “Nice to meet you. I’m Anna” “Good Luck” he said…
And I may or may not have yelled out clown school! again.
Oh well. A consolation prize, I guess, no celebrity love, but at least some luck.
But if you’re out there Martin Starr, I’m waiting for you at my clown show, and I’m ready for love.